cleaning the dark corners
Dec. 10th, 2007 01:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
athenagreyOn more than one occasion, I have joked that being a witch entails a lot of housecleaning. It seems that each Sabbat, as my family observed it, begins with a period of cleaning and renewal. Yule is no different.
This is the dark time of the year, the Dreamtime, the time of quiet contemplation of the things that lie deeply within the heart. For me, it is still a time for grieving, of turning of the wheel of the year without Jannie's steady hand to guide me. I'm on my own now, not quite a crone in my own right, but growing into my wisdom. This is where the path grows steeper, where I must stop and catch my breath while the impetuous ones run ahead.
And so at home in the Aerie, I am conscious of the dark time, and very grateful for what it entails. As a witch, I am not caught up in the frenzy of Christmas. I have my own traditions to follow, and sometimes they cross paths with the mainstream, before diverging into something more organic and calm.
I have been polishing brass and scrubbing the hearth. This is how I prepare for Yule, which I celebrate at the hearth. This is the time for poking into the dark corners and clearing cobwebs. This is the time for sitting on the floor in the dark, looking at the tree branches buffeting back and forth in the wind. The spiral has wrapped tightly inward and I must listen--listen--listen.
I haven't felt this calm in a long time. The last years of Jannie's life drained my energy. I had to be strong, and I had to be in charge. I was pulled in so many directions at once, and I knew that no matter what I did, she would still die. It was a question of how well she could live during that time. I did all that I could and I regret none of it. NOT ONE THING. In these past eight months, I have been learning to relax, learning to indulge myself again, and learning how to fill the days that are both blisfully undemanding and sometimes terrifyingly empty.
Soon, the pine cones that grace my mantle will be joined by a garland of evergreen, and the figure of the old Holly King will be unwrapped and placed on display.
Soon, I will come to rest in a clean and orderly Aerie, pausing in the darkness.
Soon, the hammered copper Sun will hold in his hands the first light of Yule, and then I will begin unwinding the spiral gently into the light.
I wish you days of peaceful contemplation.
This is the dark time of the year, the Dreamtime, the time of quiet contemplation of the things that lie deeply within the heart. For me, it is still a time for grieving, of turning of the wheel of the year without Jannie's steady hand to guide me. I'm on my own now, not quite a crone in my own right, but growing into my wisdom. This is where the path grows steeper, where I must stop and catch my breath while the impetuous ones run ahead.
And so at home in the Aerie, I am conscious of the dark time, and very grateful for what it entails. As a witch, I am not caught up in the frenzy of Christmas. I have my own traditions to follow, and sometimes they cross paths with the mainstream, before diverging into something more organic and calm.
I have been polishing brass and scrubbing the hearth. This is how I prepare for Yule, which I celebrate at the hearth. This is the time for poking into the dark corners and clearing cobwebs. This is the time for sitting on the floor in the dark, looking at the tree branches buffeting back and forth in the wind. The spiral has wrapped tightly inward and I must listen--listen--listen.
I haven't felt this calm in a long time. The last years of Jannie's life drained my energy. I had to be strong, and I had to be in charge. I was pulled in so many directions at once, and I knew that no matter what I did, she would still die. It was a question of how well she could live during that time. I did all that I could and I regret none of it. NOT ONE THING. In these past eight months, I have been learning to relax, learning to indulge myself again, and learning how to fill the days that are both blisfully undemanding and sometimes terrifyingly empty.
Soon, the pine cones that grace my mantle will be joined by a garland of evergreen, and the figure of the old Holly King will be unwrapped and placed on display.
Soon, I will come to rest in a clean and orderly Aerie, pausing in the darkness.
Soon, the hammered copper Sun will hold in his hands the first light of Yule, and then I will begin unwinding the spiral gently into the light.
I wish you days of peaceful contemplation.
